The RSFDWFP Syndrome Part 2

Who are those fine looking folks...I've never seen them before in my life!

As mentioned in my previous post, I have a problem with what I call "The RSFDWFP Syndrome," that is a "Ridiculous Single-Focused Disorder When Facing Problems". In other words, when a potentially big problem confronts me, my worry-prone  heart serves my mind an arrest warrant and locks it away until the problem is passed. In its cell, unable to be distracted from any of life's other demands, my mind focuses only on the problem, analyzing every possible scenario, past, present and future. My last blog story was an extreme example where my single-focus on the problem drove away my appetite and my sleep as I couldn't stop replaying both my mistakes that led us into the problem as well as the 1001 stresses my family would experience if I couldn't find a solution out of it within 24 hours. This second story, I hope shows some improvement on my part, though I'm not convinced, given the fact that the whole "problem" may have been fabricated in my mind.

At first it seemed like the best of both worlds, we buy the cheapest available ticket on a flight between Addis Ababa and Bangkok, while at the same time getting a 18-hour daytime layover in Cairo both on the way there and on the way back. And why not? Our kids sleep amazingly well on planes, trains and automobiles so we've no fear of red-eye flights on their account. And besides, we'd heard of how Egypt Air treats all of their passengers (with a  5+ hour layover) to a free hotel room and the freedom to explore the city, all in exchange for allowing them to hold our passports as a guarantee that we will return for our connecting flight.

And so, on August 23^rd,  after our first red-eye flight from Addis to Cairo, we navigated our way through the hoops and eventually found ourselves on the shuttle to the hotel. Immediately, we were impressed, as it was clearly above the standard of hotel we'd ever pay for for ourselves. Multiple restaurants, multiple pools, and what looked like important people all around. As we checked into our room, I approached the concierge with the request of how we might see the pyramids during our time. He set us up with driver and a time of departure, "Its only $100, and that includes your entrance fees. Meet here at 12:30pm." After exploring the facilities, playing on the playground and then nibbling a bit on the complimentary buffet lunch provided as part of our room, we returned to the concierge desk where we were introduced to Mohammad, our driver. "You want to see the pyramids? I'll do more than that for you…I'll include the papyrus museum, the Nile river, the sphinx, and more at no extra cost." "Great," we agreed, though in hindsight, I now see that I should have done some internet research beforehand. The following I write for the benefit of anyone who intends to travel to/through Egypt.

Our first stop was the Papyrus Museum, which I found interesting having studied much about papyrus in Bible school and seminary. Museum, however, was a bit of a misleading term. Rather it was a high pressure sales event. Luckily for them, I was interested in their goods, but even after bartering I walked away quite sure that I drew the short end of the stick. Oh well. That's the life of a tourist that I'm very much not used to. The next "stop" consisted of us driving on the bridge over the Nile river, which turns out wasn't really "thrown in for free" since we had to drive over that bridge to get the pyramids. As we approached the ancient sites, several young people tried to stop the car and not permit us to go further. Muhammad told us that these were bad people who were somehow related to the recent political unrest. We didn't quite follow. We were assured that he would take care of us.

After what felt like 6 U-turns, we pulled into a small parking lot, then out the back through an alley, before parking next to some camels and horses. We were hurried into a small room and asked to sit down as an intimidating Egyptian man entered and closed the door behind him. In his sales pitch, he told us how we could choose to ride camels, horses or go in a horse-pulled carriage. We chose the carriage given that it was extremely hot, and the sun was mercilessly beating down on our already stressed kids. Ok, horse and buggy it was. He then gave us three packages by which we could see the pyramids: 1 Pyramid = $48 a person, 2 Pyramids and the Sphinx = $75 a person, or all 9 Pyramids, the Sphinx, ancient temple, and the top of a mountain where the whole scene could be caught in an excellent photo shoot = $92 a person (kids free). Now, given no other options, we grudgingly agreed to the biggest package, justifying it as a once-in-a-lifetime thing.

Ok, so we handed the cash over and soon found ourselves herded next door into another room, where a young lady hit us with her best sales tactics in selling her ridiculously overpriced merchandise – this time oils and perfumes. Having already used up nearly all of the US dollars that we had brought along for the day, we got out of there 20-minutes later, without buying anything, but not without mounting frustration. We got on our horse and buggy and rode for less than 1 minute, as right around the corner (unknown to us) was the historical site entrance gate, where we had to disembark for security check. As we joined our horse on the other side, I began to realize something. The "entrance fee" included in the hotel concierge's price was the $2 ticket I just handed the guard, and one option I was not allowed to choose in the room around the corner was "entering on foot and walking around by ourselves." Now, given the age of our kids, the strength of the sun, and the length of the walk, I'm not sure I would have chosen anything other than a horse and buggy, but having not been given the choice, I clenched my teeth in anger. Next, as we entered, I realized that the whole package selection was a complete joke. For example, in order to get to the 1 pyramid option, one must pass by the temple ruins, the sphinx and one of the other big pyramids. In other words, as best as I could tell, options 1 and 2 were exactly the same, except the $27 price difference. And the third option being made to sound so wonderful, well, it wasn't. Our horse driver/tour guide's English wasn't very good, his accent made him very difficult to understand, and he didn't seem to be very knowledgeable beyond the bare facts. I could have gotten a much better tour had I printed off and brought along a section of Wikipedia. Nevertheless, this being once-in-a-lifetime, that meant that I'd never have to be ripped off again.

At the end of the buggy ride, the driver stopped around the corner and gave us a speech about how he works only for tips, which first of all, I highly doubt. Having already been relieved of much of my cash, I gave him much less than what he thought he deserved, but so be it. We weren't impressed and wanted the tip to show it. When we arrived back at the back-alley parking spot, we were herded back into the oil and perfume lady's room and told to wait. Not wanting to, we got up and left, found our car driver smoking on a hookah hose and told him we were done. All of our tiredness and frustration was obvious to him and so he led us to the car. Once on the road again, he asked a bit with a  touch of meekness, "So you don't want to stop at the alabaster factory on the way back to the hotel?" "NO!" we both responded, knowing we'd be putting ourselves into the jaws of another high pressure sales event! Less than a block from the hotel he pulled into a packed gas station and queued up in line. You have got to be kidding me! As I was bracing myself for being asked to pay for his fuel, Andrea politely, yet firmly asked if he could take us to the hotel immediately. He agreed.

Thankful to finally be back to the hotel, I gave Muhammad the last bit of our American dollars for his tip. Grrr…Are we glad we did it? Sure. But we were more glad that we wouldn't have to do it again. All told, it had only cost us $399, and we have several pictures and two papyrus paintings to show for it. Not the end of the world, but believe me, we were D-O-N-E with Egyptian tourism and the pushy, tip-demanding culture that went along with it.

Now, all of that was laying a foundation for the RSFDWFP crisis to start in my mind. Both the airline and the hotel had told us that we would need to be ready to leave the hotel at 9:30pm to return to the airport. And so, after eating another complimentary buffet meal, and letting the kids sleep a bit in real beds, we went to the lobby to catch our ride. The lobby, however, was CRAZY with angry people crowding all the reception desks stretching their papers in the faces of the workers in order to try to get their attention. I went to the "hotel taxi" desk and said that we were supposed to be taken to the airport. He called over a big man, who then led us quickly outside, passed the airport shuttle van, down a ramp, through a parking lot and over to the last car in the row. We piled in and he drove us the 5 minutes to the airport, where we disembarked and thanked him. "What do you mean, thank you?" He responded with his hands stretched wide. We all stopped in our tracks, "I'm sorry, I have no money for a tip." He continued, "There is no 'I'm sorry', this is my personal car, this is not the airport shuttle!" I tried again, "I'm sorry, but I have no money, if someone must pay you, it is either the hotel or Egypt Air who provided us the room at your hotel. I'm sorry." And we turned and walked into the airport, not daring to turn around to see what became of the fuming man at least twice my size.

The airport was a madhouse, complete with high-volume yelling on the verge of fist fights on at least two occasions (no, not involving us). An hour later, we boarded our plane, where a kind Thai flight-attendant advised us on how to save two entire rows on the only half-full flight. Andrea, Micah and Grace fell asleep even before take-off leaving me alone with my thoughts. I was very happy to be leaving Egypt behind, and at the same time, thankful for the Ethiopian culture, which we have found to be much more respectful and hospitable toward their visitors. Then again, when money typically flows like water out of tourist's hands, it makes sense that Egyptian salesmen want to get in on that as much as possible. The fact that we live in Africa and on a tighter budget than most international tourists, probably made the day much more difficult than it needed to be. And in that final conflict with the "non-shuttle" driver, what if it had been our fault? I had assumed that he had chosen to use his personal vehicle in order to milk a $20+ bonus for a mere 10 minutes of work. What if, the shuttle was reserved for the big group that was wrecking havoc in the lobby (likely a cancelled flight)? What if I had gone to the wrong place when I went to the "hotel taxi" desk, or requested the wrong service instead of asking for the complimentary shuttle for transit passengers? What if there was not complimentary shuttle returning to the airport? I began doubting the righteousness of my anger. "But wait," the terrifying thought finally occurred to me, "We are scheduled to fly this route back again, landing us for a full-day layover in Cairo again in exactly two weeks. So, presumably, Egypt Air will hook us up with a room in the same hotel, on the same day of the week (Saturday) and we will be in need of a ride back to the airport at the exact same time (9:30pm)!" Will we run into the same disgruntled man? In my RSFDWFP plagued mind, it was not only possible, but likely, and so I had two weeks to devise a plan. After all, this big guy probably had a "back room" of his own and "high pressure sales tactics" that we surely didn't want to see.

Thankfully, fear of what would happen in Cairo, didn't ruin our vacation, even when I saw a BBC news report of three British/American journalists who have been held in Egypt for many months without a charge brought against them. But that doesn't mean it didn't occupy any space in the back of my mind. One day, Andrea and I went to the dentist (going to the dentist while on vacation? – oh yea! Quality service at great prices! We couldn't pass it up!). When waiting for Andrea to get her work done, Micah, Grace and I took a walk. When I saw a currency exchange place, I had an idea - I could transfer some of the Thai Baht I had gotten from the ATM back into American dollars in order to have cash in my pocket in case of the anticipated conflict in Egypt. At least then, if I was in the wrong, I could pay for the previous ride and make things right. Or so I hoped.

As the day of our return to Cairo approached, I began to think about it more seriously and, of course during the hours when others were sleeping, I began rehearsing the umpteen possible scenes we might encounter in Egypt. We could refuse the complimentary hotel and just sit at the airport for 18 hours. That would be a bummer, especially for Micah and Grace who had seen the nice swimming pools last time but hadn't been allowed the time to swim. We could make our previous dissatisfaction known and request a room at a different hotel. Or we could go with the flow and hope to fly under the radar. When walking through the public areas of the hotel, we could split up so that we aren't ever seen as a family of 4, or we could try disguising our appearance! "Aha!" I decided and asked our friends in Chiang Mai, "It wouldn't hurt to carry some disguise elements, where can I buy cheap sunglasses and a women's head scarf?" On the afternoon of our departure, Rob took me to a local market where we found just what we were looking for (big sunglasses - $1.50 each, a white Thai silk scarf with green zebras - $2.50).

With unexpected calmness in my heart, maybe due to an over-confidence in our disguises, we arrived at our gate at the Bangkok airport where Micah and Grace quickly claimed a row of seats and fell asleep. As the hours passed, it became apparent that our 12:50am flight was going to be delayed. First a 45-minute delay was announced, then another hour was added and passengers were given free soda/water in addition to being informed that they could get meal vouchers to get a "snack" up to $8 each. Taking turns with our kids still sleeping, Andrea and I bought a whole bunch of over-priced airport food with our $32, but unfortunately the airport DQ had shut down its ice cream machines for the night. Right when Andrea returned with her bounty of goodies, we received word that the flight would be delayed until 5pm the next evening and that we would all be given hotel rooms in Bangkok. Having small kids (and one more on the way) helped us see a different side of the Egyptian culture as those on our flight  encouraged us to go directly to the front of the immigration line, putting us on the first hotel shuttle, and giving us some priority in the hotel reception line. The Thai lady behind the counter blessed us again when she said, "Don't tell anyone (does that include this blog?) but our rooms are filling up fast with all these single travelers, you have four people in one room so I will give you an extra big room." And that it was – HUGE! At somewhere around 4:30 or 5am all four of us crashed and slept in the King size bed, waking up just in time to catch the end of our complimentary breakfast buffet. The morning consisted of playing in the hotel toy room and swimming in their cold, but still fun pool! An over-the-top delicious lunch buffet (once again complimentary) filled our bellies before we were rushed off to the airport again.

The flight left Bangkok around 7:30pm, arriving in Cairo with just enough time for the person at the transfer desk to say "Go with him, quickly." A brisk walk to our next gate and we soon found ourselves on our flight to Addis Ababa. American dollars still in my pocket, disguises left undisturbed in our carry-on, and, as we would find out later, both of our checked luggage pieces having made the quick transfer with us, we were leaving Egypt without the anticipated conflict. We had traded our stressful layover at the posh hotel in Cairo in for a stress-free delay at an equally posh hotel in Bangkok. And yes, while I processed through the situation enough to exchange money, plan all of our potential movements in the hotel, and buy some cheap disguises, honestly, this potential trouble didn't have nearly the control over me that similar ones have had in the recent past. I pray that these blogs act as my confession of a problem I want to overcome. That I might learn to walk through the trials with a peace, allowing myself to engage the situation, but yet maintaining control over my mind,  knowing that some way or another, things will turn out just fine, as they most often do.  "My name is Travis and I've suffered from RSFDWFP. But by God's grace, and continuing to trust in his faithful provision of a way out, I'll soon be free!"